Enlightening Thought #21

You know those times when you think in circles?

Oh! Does he like me? Do I like him? Why do I like him? Is it just because I have a chance with him (we're both desperate) or because I genuinely like him? Do I want to date him? Does he want to date me? Am I any good in relationships? What if I botch everything up? AHH!

Or:

Ugh, I'm bored. Woot, I'll watch a movie! Fuck... I'm too bored to watch a movie. Ooh, my friend just sent me a link; he says it's amusing. Damn it all! I'm too bored to click on that link and then pay attention... What do I do? I'm still freaking bored!

Or:

I'm hungry. Wait, I can't eat; I'm too fat. But... I'm hungry! I want sugar! Well, I'll just eat an apple then, that has sugar. Wait, apples aren't filling... I know! I'll eat cookies and ice cream again (lolwut. Logic fail. Cookies and ice cream aren't filling either). No, I can't eat that; I'll just get fatter. But... I'm hungry still! Fuck it all, I'll eat the goddamned cookie. (nomnomnom) I'm still hungry. Time to eat ice cream! (nomnomnom). Hm, too much junk food, I'll balance that with an apple. (nomnomnom).



You think and think and you worry and worry and you question and question until... 5, 10, or 30 minutes of your life has passed by, and yet, you've accomplished absolutely nothing.

You know what you should do instead?

Either act on your gut instinct or simply stop thinking.

Remember, it truly is possible to think too hard.
Stop. You don't want to hurt yourself.

Enlightening Thought #20

Sometime in the past two weeks, I decided that I needed a new pair of sunglasses. I headed over to some websites and began browsing through pages upon pages of lenses. Wayfarers looked pretty enticing. They were colorful and bright (summery and sunshiney!)... and had been popular in the 1960's - the same time Converses had become popular. And OMFG, I love Converses. I figured I could just adopt the 60's style or something and leave this century behind.

WRONG.

I ran into a road block when I discovered I couldn't decide between the red and white Wayfarers. So I went to Google and image searched "Wayfarers" to see how different colors looked on different people.

And what was I met with?

THIS.


Is he constipated?

And worse yet...

THIS.


I make duck lips yay. (Actually, I'm not sure which one is worse.)

I felt so scarred. But at least I was saved.

The moral of the story?

Do a Google search before making any major life decisions.

Or your face may become permanently stuck in the "D:" position.

Enlightening Thought #19

As Juliana noted in her comment on Enlightening Thought #17, many of my posts have been rather contradictory. Seventeen advocated hoping for the best, while fifteen was about preparing for the worst. Fifteen was also about the fact that how we tend to be overconfident, while four was about how we have reason to believe in ourselves.

So how exactly are these opposing ideas supposed to help anybody towards becoming a better person?

Very carefully is how. Don't be a mere sheep and obey everything that others say. Use your brain and think about which approach would be best for your circumstances. If somebody tells you to jump, don't ask, "How high?" Rather, think about how you may benefit, compare those benefits with those from a different course of action. Analyse your options, and once again, behave rationally. After all, you don't want to be the subject of this article.

While I aim to bring only the best words of advice to the readers of Fail Thoughts, not everything will apply to you. Some ideas will help more than others.

Use your judgement.

Don't be like them.

Enlightening Thought #18

When I'm at work, the thing I love most is seeing the kids I tutor smile. If you don't know about Kumon, it is a learning center dedicated to stretching young children beyond their mental and cognitive abilities, starting at a very early age. They are dragged, kicking and screaming, into the center, sat down in a chair and forced to do anywhere from 5 - 10 pages of math and reading problems for the bragging rights of their parents. Needless to say, they are usually in a gloomy, miserable and generally unhappy state of mind.


(Notice how even the smiley is not smiling!)

Back when I first started working at Kumon, I despised it. I had an utterly terrible time at work. The kids hated the packets, the bosses hated me, I hated the lack of contribution I seemed to be making, and it all added up to a less than unrewarding experience.


(They usually don't look this happy...)

As time passed, however, I learned to appreciate the children. While the other kids were biking with their friends on Friday nights, these kids were stuck here doing math problems with me. I know I can never make up for the lost hours of their childhood, but I try my best to make them happy. I try to communicate with them, listen to them tell me about their day, share jokes, and give them something to laugh about in the bleak half an hour that they spend at the center.

And I've realized that it doesn't take that much to make people smile. A little goodness can go a long way as each little piece adds up. Instead of being a silent, monotonous statue all the time,

Try to brighten up someone's day.

Seeing the kids smile gives me something to smile about, and realizing that the time they spend with me is not all torture and waste makes my job that much more pleasant and rewarding. Even if you don't think it's a lot to listen to someone's stories or share a friendly laugh, it can make their day just a little bit better and brighter to try.

Enlightening Thought #17

This post took forever to write. Why? Because I couldn't think of any new experiences that met the two unspoken blog requirements of Fail Thoughts:

1. That it is about a shittily universal experience.
2. That it is written from a somewhat humorous perspective.
   

So what does this mental block mean? Is everything in my life all peaches and cream-like? And are these peaches stuffed with happiness and joy?


(Yum, delicious!)

Or is there nothing in my life that I may laugh at? Is my life so goddamned sucky that there is no reason to crack even the slightest smile?

Is everything wonderful, or is everything terrible?

Well, to answer the (rhetorical) question, it's obviously a mix between the two. Just today, I smiled and I cried. (Oh, the wonderful hormones of a woman!) The scale may shift towards one end one day, but move towards the other at a different moment.

But that leads me to another question; which extreme is life closer to?

And to answer that question, I have no idea. However, I do know which life I would prefer, and that would be a joy-filled life where I have reason to laugh. Yes, this is unrealistic. Hopefully though, the simple act of keeping this ideal in mind will help tip the balance away from the black doom of the other.

Thus, to close this long-winded ramble, your newest enlightening thought is this:

Hope for happier days, and you will receive happier days.

Enlightening Thought #16

With a site titled "fail thoughts," I figured we should address failure more often. Many of the thoughts on here actually result in fail, but never do we bring up anything that is already fail. Enjoy.



















[Images courtesy of failblog]

Enlightening Thought #15

In light of recent events, I feel a need to address Enlightened Thought #4. Actually, this is more of an off-shoot from the earlier blog than a counter-post.

So, a few months ago, I had applied for a prestigious summer research internship. I was contacted for an interview, and upon leaving the lab, I felt that I was extremely qualified for the position. After all, I had prior research experience, I knew how to use all of the tools in the lab, I had top-notch numbers, and I was going to Caltech, for heaven's sake!

And then, I checked the mail:
I was rejected.

The letter of consolation said that I should be proud of being in the top third of applicants. Top third? 33%?! I should be proud of that? I've been in the top 5% of everything my entire life! I'm the goddamn Batman!

That letter opened the floodgates for a chain reaction of self-doubt. I thought, "What if I'm not really that great? What if this is a sign of failure? What if I never end up achieving my dreams?"

Thankfully, the answer miraculously appeared:

Don't be overconfident. Expect and prepare for the worst.

Sooner or later, your lucky streak will end, and you don't want all of your doors locked shut.



Not everybody will always think that you're a piece of HOT shit.

Enlightening Thought #14

People today live in the fast lane. We live in a world where we're always rushing to start something, rushing to finish something, rushing to get somewhere, and rushing to leave somewhere. There's simply always more that we need to do.

People today live life loud (damn, that's some nice alliteration right there!). There's always somebody saying something to us, some sort of noise in the background (construction, traffic, or that person who just won't stop nagging at us...), music playing, or something. Anything.

The only chance we have to slow and quiet down is in those few minutes before sleep. Even then, our thoughts are usually rushing around in our mind, reminding us of the shitton of stuff that we have to attempt to accomplish tomorrow.

As a result, we lead stressed, hectic, frazzled, and all-around unhappy lives.

And so, to right this terrible wrong, and to make life calmer and smoother, I offer to you the following piece of wisdom:

Listen to soothing music.

No metal, no pop, no indie, etc. Don't listen to anything where any words and lyrics are actually understandable.



Granted, you won't be in complete silence, but this will be the closest to catharsis as you'll ever get.

My own personal suggestions include: Sigur Ros (Post-rock), Radiohead (Experimental rock), Ravel (Classical), and Saint-Saens (also Classical).

Enlightening Thought #13

Today, instead of plugging in the ear buds to my Zune and listening to my newest music downloads, I dug out my CD player. I slipped in an old mix CD a friend had made for me in middle school, and turned the volume up.

As I listened to the notes, the memories began to rush back into my head. Networks of connections that had been left untouched for years lit up once again in my mind, and the notes tightened and pulled on a strand of my heart. The rhythms reverberated through my body as the visualizations took me back to the innocent sunsets and magnificent fireworks of the summer before high school.



At first, I was afraid to let go of the present. What was in the here and now, I could deal with. The past was so distant and delicate that even the thought of it could drive painful stakes into the path of my life. It was not somewhere I wanted to go, nor did I want the memories to make me weak in the present.

But then I settled back and just let the memories flow through me. It was a wonderful feeling. The past is a part of who I am and always will be. Reminiscence can make me weak, but the lessons and wisdom will make me strong. It is my experiences that make up who I am, and the experiences that I must accept in order to be capable of living in the present and moving into the future.

And so I realized that

It's okay to lose yourself in your past once in a while.

Because the experiences we have are what make us unique and different, but also what connect us to the larger context of humanity. The present is just the departure of the past and the arrival of the future. Our memories are a part of who we are.

Enlightening Thought #12

Today's 4/20, the day of revelry for potheads! Today's also a Monday, the day of my weekly piano lesson.

Prior to my lesson, I'd been extremely sleepy and grumpy, and I simply was in a flat-out bad mood. But after an hour of musical goodness (granted, most of it was filled with my teacher pointing out mistakes...), I felt whole enough. Happy and free. I was riding my own natural high.

The point of this brief post?
Don't do drugs.

Get high off of music.

Now, I'm off to enjoy some more music. You should be too!